Know your nose.

Were the rules of attraction made to be broken? If not broken, perhaps, enhanced? Who’s to say, but one thing is for certain: finding the right mix of sensuality, and pheromone, is the kind of thing genies have socked away in bottles for centuries. What makes women find a particular man desirable? Every man has a special ‘something’ that makes him unique, be it charm, bicep dimension, the proverbial shoe size, or the PIN number to his debit card. The list is exhaustive, so, how will you set yourself apart? 

You won’t find the answer in your father’s Old Spice, or even in the old school of conventional masculine wisdom. Although your heart’s settled on a favorite aromatic love tonic, does it truly define you? Does it drive the woman in your life passionately crazy, or does it drive her away? 

Give yourself a competitive edge, in the game of love, with the perfect scent for a sophisticated gent such as yourself.  Determine whether you prefer a strong and robust scent or a subtle, yet, clean and cool one. Whichever appeals to your senses, understand why this is so, by getting to know your nose.  From Giorgio Armani to Givenchy, and Ralph Lauren to Bvlgari, with so many scents from which to choose, how will you best decide? 

It’s in the notes. To be precise, the composition of any fine fragrance (male or female) is such that it will feature three distinct elements, or notes (top/head, middle/heart, and base), each unfolding over time; creating a symphony for the senses. Top notes offer an introductory scent that tends to be lighter, yet is highly volatile. Chances are you purchased your favorite scent based on this particular note. Top notes evaporate quickly, so allow a fragrance time to linger.  You will soon discover that the best of it has only begun. 

Enter the middle note. Often referred to as the heart of the fragrance, middle notes are strong and enduring. Remember that you are unique, and no two men will wear the same fragrance alike. When testing a fragrance, wear it no less than 15 minutes. In time, it will emit a signature aroma, as the elements fuse with your body’s natural chemistry. 

Last, but not least, are the base notes. These are the strongest ingredients of a fragrance, and serve as a fixative melding all other notes together. The base note provides for extended wear, of a fragrance, and prolongs its aromatic properties. 

All scents, from the impostor to the designer, belong to one of four distinct categories including Fresh, Floral, Oriental, and Woody (with a central trans-category of Aromatic Fougère). That’s right!  Contrary to popular belief, all fragrances are, in fact, cut from the same cloth.

By concentration, cologne contains 2 – 5% essential oils, and fragrance compounds, in contrast to perfumes, which contain upwards of 20%.  As nature’s perfect stimulants, essential oils induce certain euphoric and relaxing sentiments. Common notes used in male fragrances include Bergamot, Cedar, Ginger, Lavender, Neroli, Patchouli, Sandalwood, and Vetiver. It’s no accident that these are woody, aromatic, tranquil, and soothing. 

So what did Giovanni Paolo Feminis know that the rest of us would pay an arm and leg?  He knew that men deserve special recognition in their quest to enhance the rules of attraction.  In answering this masculine battle cry, Giovanni developed the perfect Scent for a Gent – his 1709 romantic elixir – cologne. Thus, the contemporary concept of male fashion cologne was born. The rest of this story can be found on Saks’ Fifth Avenue, your bedroom armoire, and in every department store worldwide.                                                                                                          

SCENT hints for a GENT:

1. Determine which notes are in your favorite cologne, or other fragrance.
2. Score some free samples online, or the next time you purchase at a department store.
3. Test no more than three scents at a time; any more will cloud your sense of smell.
4. The smell of coffee beans will clear the sinuses; the sales representative will have some.
5. Apply cologne to clean skin, most commonly after a shower.
6. Cologne should be worn on the body; hotspots include wrists, neck, and behind ears.
7. Rubbing wrists together will crush, or breakdown, a scent more rapidly. 
8. Spray cologne into the air, and walk into the mist for even distribution.
9. Store cologne in a cool, dry, place away from direct sunlight.
10. Properly stored cologne will last approximately three years. 

Now that you’ve got the basics, a little trial, and error, is in order. You hereby have permission to slather, spritz, and douse… within in reason.

Examine your motivation. Have you been satisfied with your look until recently? If so, why have you decided to grow a goatee now? Does the new woman in your life drop hints, or, on occasion, make mention of how her ex had one? Did you recently lose a considerable amount of weight?  Are you going through what the rest of the world refers to as a midlife crisis, and want to feel young and virile again?  There are plenty of reasons, or non-reasons, to grow a goatee.  Be honest with yourself and examine your motivation.  Be certain that you are changing your look for you.  When you look into the mirror, you should like what you see – chin and all.  

Consider the time. Have you recently begun to grow your goatee?  In the beginning, your goatee may look somewhat awkward, or downright silly. Consider the time it will take to complete the look you want to achieve. Check your calendar. If your immediate plans, or obligations, include family or wedding photos, or an important speaking engagement, you may want to delay plans for your new chin friend, until a more suitable time. Look – into the mirror – before you leap, and allow your new goatee to grow in peace, not in pieces.

 Consider the upkeep.  How much time will you spend grooming each day?  In order for your goatee to look its best, proper grooming is essential.  If you have minimal time for grooming, wearing a goatee style that requires a high level of maintenance may not be ideal. If your schedule is busy, but your heart is set on wearing a goatee, try opting for a simple style versus something more complex. 

Consider your occupation.  Even in the twenty-first century – the bottom line is – a goatee might not be acceptable to wear in certain occupations. Some employers ask that employees refrain from wearing certain styles of facial hair, or displaying certain types of  piercings, while in their employ, and/or on their premises. If your career path trumps your choice of beard expression, abandon this mission. For most, this will not be a problem, but do use your discretion.

 Understand the shape of your face.  Your goatee should enhance, or compliment your existing facial features. A large face with a narrowly trimmed goatee will appear out of proportion.  On the other hand, a small face with a long or extremely thick goatee will appear overpowered.  Keep in mind that a goatee is not a full beard, and, by definition, only refers to the tuft of hair grown from the chin.  This does grant you some leeway; however, understanding the shape of your face will help you make the best decision.  Round, square, and oval-shaped faces are all complimented by a goatee.  For those with a long face, an actual beard that is fuller on the sides, and short underneath the chin, will serve to create the illusion of being more balanced. 

Consider the style. Throughout history, men have donned various styles of facial hair, including the goatee.  Popularized in the 17th century, by the Flemish painter, Sir Anthony Van Dyck, there are many styles from which to choose.  Wear it alone, with a mustache, or accented by a soul patch (a tuft of hair grown directly below the bottom lip).  Experiment with any number of variations, always keeping your goatee trimmed, neat, and clean.

Don’t ditch the itch.  If you have recently begun to grow your goatee, you may find yourself irritated from the itching.  Be patient, and don’t be so quick to ditch the itch.  Although stubble can be quite annoying, the itching should be non-existent when your goatee has grown to the desired length.  To soothe an itchy chin, try using a dab of talcum powder.

Abandon the peach fuzz.  Be honest with yourself and face the facts: a few lone wiry hairs doth not a goatee make.  Growing a goatee may not be right for you, if it takes more than several weeks to achieve reasonable thickness, or denseness, in the chin hair.  Understand that genetics, and your overall health, determine the quantity, quality, and length of hair on any part of the body.  If the growth pattern of your goatee remains sparse, scraggly, or if you find your chin resembling fruit, it might be time to abandon the peach fuzz. 

Is it fair?  Hair color should not be the determining factor.  Contrary to popular belief, fair-haired goatees can be just as attractive as darker ones.  If you are fair-haired, allow your goatee, or beard, to grow-in before making your final decision.  Oftentimes, beard hair will be several shades darker, but even if this is not the case, a fair-haired goatee might be the right look for you. Lastly, if you are a mature gent, don’t be discouraged by gray hair.  Besides, who says a silver fox has to live on top of your head?  Many women find facial hair extremely attractive, and the more salt-n-pepper – the better.

Consider your partner.  Your partner may not be turned on by a vision of you with chin decorations, of the keratin kind.  Talk to your partner and find out what she thinks.  You may be surprised by her image of a sexier you.  Also, remember that during the awkward stubble phase, delivering a kiss with a tickle, or scratch, may not be on her list of approved romantic gestures. 

Whether you decide to Goatee or Go Bare, be adventurous and enjoy finding the right look for you.

Flying was once a glamorous and stylish affair: passengers wore their best outfits, families would come to the airport to wave them goodbye, and pilots and air hostesses were revered for having the best jobs in the world. To be able to fly also meant that you had arrived; you were one of the chosen few who could afford the privilege.

Today, flying is considered a fundamental right to be enjoyed by the masses, and, somewhere along the turbulent line, what was demure and gracious has become raging and ragged.

The fundamental rule for air travel, much like life in general, is that politeness and consideration will go a long way in ensuring a smooth, relaxed journey.

At the Airport

From the long line at check-in to the long wait at security, the experience can be rather fraught, but getting annoyed and raising an angry voice will only make the situation worse. In most cases, airport staff are friendly and helpful: security staff are there for that very function, our security, and it’s not the check-in desk’s fault that an airplane has been delayed or cancelled, however upsetting or disruptive it is to our plans.

Going through security can be extremely tiresome, but the process could be far less traumatic if we prepare ourselves whilst in the queue – remove all keys, coins, watches, belts and laptops in advance, ready to place in to the tray, and please abide by the rules for liquids and sharp objects as they’re there for our safety.

Boarding

On arrival at the gate, please stay seated until your boarding group has been called, especially if you have an allocated seat. You won’t be allowed on the plane any quicker and you’ll merely be making the whole process more tedious and time consuming for all. If you’re fortunate enough to turn left into first class when embarking, please refrain from any smug glances at those in cattle class and the ‘do you know who I am?’ line is also best avoided!

Once onboard, the scrimmage begins to find enough space for carry-on luggage. Contrary to popular belief, we don’t have the right to the space above our allocated seat, therefore if it is full, the flight attendant will have to find a space elsewhere in the plane. This is, of course, a slight annoyance, but as long as you remove anything essential, you shouldn’t need to have access to your luggage during the flight.

Photo Courtesy of The Telegraph

A common issue before take-off is with other passengers asking to switch seats. If you are travelling alone and don’t mind moving, then it’s a very kind gesture, but do not feel that you must acquiesce through guilt or embarrassment, unless, of course, a child is involved, as you are entitled to the seat that you have pre selected or have been allocated. Window and aisle seats are highly coveted prizes on a flight, but please choose your seat wisely – if you are someone who tends to get up from your seat frequently, try not to select a window seat as, not only will it cause disruption for those seated next to you, but it’s also a pain for you.

Take a Seat

You should, by now, be comfortable in your seat and about to press the recline button. It’s advisable to keep your chair upright unless you really have to lower it, as space is already limited. However, it’s safe to assume that most people will want to recline, especially on long haul journeys, but remember to inform the person behind you that you’re about to recline – there are few things worse than an extortionately expensive gin and tonic ending up on your lap.

It should also be noted that there’s no law or magic formula for your armrest – your neighbour is just as entitled to it as you are, so my only advice is to be respectful and share it equally – keep your elbows tucked in and any bags or magazine on your side of the seat. In a recent TripAdvisor survey of 3,200 US travellers, 25% reported that leg room was their biggest issue with air travel, with 30% wanting more leg room and 38% wanting bigger seats.

If you need to get up from your seat, try to find the most appropriate and least disruptive time to do it, which is usually not when the cabin crew are serving food. When leaving your seat, try not to hold on to the headrest of the passenger in front of you, as they may be one of the lucky ones who manage to sleep for the whole journey.

Eating Onboard

We are all acutely aware that airplane food is far from haute cuisine, but we are all in the same boat, so to speak, and complaining about it excessively won’t help. It might be worth buying food that is easy to transport at the airport, which you can then enjoy during the flight, but please refrain from strong odours and flavours.

Small Talk

If you are travelling alone, it can be quite a lonely experience and it might seem natural to engage your neighbour in conversation. Sporadic small talk is fine, but don’t regale countless stories, especially if your neighbour does not reciprocate, as most people prefer to travel in silence with a good book or movie. 73% of travellers said that a little small talk is fine, but that they prefer to keep to themselves for most of the flight.

Funny Business

We seem to forget that we are in public when flying, but it’s important to remember that, even when flying during the night, we’re not in our own homes and, as such, we should behave appropriately. A fumble under the covers might be a regular treat at home and it may seem a great idea with the free champagne fuelling the adrenaline of being at 35,000 feet, but on a plane, and later in the courts, it is considered public indecency. Just ask the couple from Dallas who were charged with outraging public decency and subsequently fined after getting amorous in their seats on a flight to Manchester in 1999.

Get Connected

With wifi becoming a real possibility on future flights, it introduces the awkward issue of controlling what people access, with one person’s idea of inappropriate being different from the next. 45% of respondents said that they would not complain if their neighbour visited inappropriate websites, but I’m sure this may change if the type of website contributed to increasing occurrences of the aforementioned amorous activities.

Child-friendly Zone?

One of the most contentious issues most of us face when flying concerns children. Nobody wants to endure a crying baby for the whole flight, least of all the parents, therefore a certain amount of leeway should be given, but parents should always enforce enough discipline to ensure that children don’t run wildly around the plane or kick the seat of the passengers in front of them. Children are easily distracted at the best of times, therefore make sure you bring ample sources of amusement such as colouring books or DVDs. 77% of those questioned in TripAdvisor’s 2009 travel trends survey thought that families should have their own section in a plane, while 46% would pay extra to be seated in a specific quiet section.

In-flight Fragrance

Personal hygiene is a big issue when in such a confined space, therefore always make sure that you are considerate to those around you. A good tip is to shower before travelling to the airport, visit the bathroom to freshen up during the flight and please keep your shoes and socks on! 68% of the survey respondents were concerned by germs and viruses when travelling, with 26% now carrying antibacterial hand creams.

Air Rage

One of the most troubling issues about being on a plane is that, not only are we in such a confined space, but we must remain in it until the end of the journey, where we have little control over the behaviour of others. In the year to March 2009, the Department of Transport reported that there were almost 3,500 incidents of disruptive behaviour on UK flights, 44 of which were deemed to be serious, with alcohol being cited as the main cause in 37% of these cases. Director Kevin Smith was recently left with a case of air rage after being asked to leave a plane for being too fat. He won’t be too happy to learn that 74% of US plane passengers think that large passengers should have to buy two seats to accommodate their size.

Alighting

Having landed safely, the allure of the beach or the sunset cocktails can be too much for some and the disembarking process can become a big tussle, with the aisles becoming blocked with a mass of people and luggage. There’s no need to jump up as soon as the plane lands as the mere minutes that could possibly be saved does not justify the inconvenience and lack of consideration for others.

It’s true that flying can often be a trying experience, but it can also be a great opportunity to relax, watch a movie, catch up on the week’s news and enjoy a drink, all in the safe knowledge that you are being transported to an idyllic beach setting or to visit a much loved friend or relative.

Everyone onboard needs to play their part to try to ensure a pleasant flying experience, and with a little bit of care, consideration and politeness we can make flying more enjoyable for us all, and maybe throw a splash of glamour in as well.

Bon Vivant

Bon Vivant is the bespoke, highly personalised concierge service that advises on and arranges every travel, lifestyle and leisure need. Members have access to exclusive treatment, complimentary benefits and discounts at top hotels, restaurants, members’ clubs, exclusive nightclubs and a range of lifestyle services as well as access to VIP and sold out events.

For affordable luxury with the personal touch for £100 per month, visit our website at http://www.bonvivant.co.uk or our blog at http://bonvivantliving.wordpress.com

Photo courtesy of photos8.com

Emyr Thomas, founder of Bon Vivant, a concierge and lifestyle management company in London, shares his thoughts on navigating the minefield of tipping in some of the world’s hottest countries.

Tipping can be socially awkward, cause endless embarrassment and be highly inconsistent and irrational, especially since it is based on the amount of a transaction instead of the quality of service.

It is imperative to remember that tipping is a gesture of appreciation for services rendered – if the service is impressive, then it deserves to be acknowledged and rewarded. More important, perhaps, is to remember to tip generously if you are a regular, as this will go a long way to ensure consistently good service and additional perks.

Deciding whether or not to tip is the easy part; the real problem lies in deciding how much to tip. Tipping is inherently linked to social custom and, as such, can vary between different cultures and countries. An inadequate tip could be considered an infringement on etiquette or an insult to a lifetime’s work.

In a country where a tip is considered a supplement to an income and not a constituent part of a wage, do not be afraid to not leave a tip if the service was not up to scratch – an important lesson for obliging Brits, perhaps.

UK

In restaurants, particularly the high-end establishments, 12.5% is usually already included on the bill, with anything between 10% and 15% being customary. In bars, it is normally at your discretion, although no tip is expected in a pub, but cocktail bars will normally add 12.5% for table service.

For hairstylists, anything between 5% and 10%, given in cash, is acceptable. In London taxis, political and economical musings come at a price, with rounding up to the nearest whole pound or up to 10% of the fare being standard. For hotel staff, a couple of pound is acceptable for maid service and for assistance with luggage.

USA

In the United States, many service sector employers pay their workers on the assumption that tips will contribute to an acceptable wage, therefore the custom of tipping is of paramount importance. Tipping is a big issue in the US in general, especially during the holiday season, with almost everyone receiving a monetary tip, including personal trainers, dry cleaners and teachers!

In restaurants, between 15% and 20% is expected, which is higher than most places, but this is more likely to go directly to the staff. Continuing with this trend, around 15% is considered standard in bars and pubs, with at least $1 per transaction. If using a taxi in New York, be prepared to add between 10% and 15% to the final bill, but don’t be afraid to dispute ill-judged journeys, as you shouldn’t have to pay for a driver’s error.

If you have a haircut, you might have to forgo the blow dry, as you’ll need an extra 15% or 20% to pay for the tip. For hotel staff, a couple of dollars is acceptable for maid service and bellboys.

France

Parisians will tell you that there is no standard for tipping in Paris, and that the French will only tip if they deem a service to be worthy. Service is normally ‘compris’, or already included, in restaurants, but excellent service can be rewarded with a further 5% left in cash.

Tips are not normally given to taxi drivers, but generally used to make giving change easier. With hairstylists, a 5 Euro tip is standard, whether the haircut costs 20 or 80 Euros.

For hotel staff, it is completely at your discretion, with a few Euros being more than sufficient. When it comes to bars, it is not customary to tip in Paris, unless, as one friend put it, you are feeling particularly guilty.

Spain

Tipping is not generally mandatory in Spain, but tends to vary with the type of venue – an upscale establishment, for example, will be more likely to expect a tip. In restaurants, service is sometimes included in the prices, but this may not make its way to the waiters, so it is acceptable to leave a further 5% to 10% in cash. When looking at a menu, be careful to note whether tax at 7% is included in the prices, or this will also be added to your bill, by law. In a casual tapas bar, tipping is not normally expected, but leave a few Euros if the service was worth it.

Tipping taxi drivers is by no means obligatory, although between 5% and 10% is considered good etiquette. The same can be applied for hair stylists, especially if you visit the same one regularly. In hotels, a few Euros for staff is more than acceptable.

Hong Kong

Tipping is not generally a large part of Hong Kong’s culture, except in hotels, where tipping is considered mandatory. HK$10 to HK$20 should be given to bellboys and maids, and remember to tip your concierge if you make use of the service.

In restaurants and bars, 10% is usually automatically added to the bill, but you should still leave a further 5% to 10% in cash for the waiters. Hairstylists will usually expect between 5% and 10%, and although taxi drivers don’t expect a tip, it is widely accepted that you should round up to the nearest dollar, or leave an additional dollar, at least.

Italy

Unlike many European countries, tipping is not generally expected in Italy, but it is, of course, always appreciated. In restaurants, a cover charge is normally already included and they tend to charge extra for bread, both of which are considered to replace the usual ‘tip’ or service charge. However, if you think that the service was worthy of reward, a tip of between 5% and 10% is gratefully received.

It’s not obligatory to tip a taxi driver, but rounding up to the nearest Euro is considered good etiquette. For hotel staff, a couple of Euros is acceptable for maid service and for assistance with luggage.

Turkey

Tipping is not generally a large part of Turkey’s culture, with modest tips being perfectly acceptable.

In restaurants and bars, you should leave 5% to 10% in cash for the waiters, and although taxi drivers don’t expect a tip, it is widely accepted that you should round up to the nearest Lira. For services that are used on a regular basis, such as hair stylists, a tip of 10% is advisable as this usually helps to ensure consistently good service.

Portugal

In Portugal, tipping is usually considered as a supplement to an income at a restaurant, therefore a tip of 10% would be greatly appreciated, although a fine dining restaurant may include up to 15% on the bill.

Taxi drivers normally expect a 10% tip on top of the fare, in hotels a few Euros should be given to bellboys and maids, and remember to tip your concierge if you make use of the service.

For further information on Bon Vivant, visit their website at http://www.bonvivant.co.uk or their blog at http://bonvivantliving.wordpress.com/.

Here at THS we will explain the difference between parties that flourish, and those that flop. More importantly we will show you the way to stay in the former camp and develop a reputation for throwing the best parties known to man.

Crowd surfing: A good indicator that your party is a success

1.) Location

The number one rule in real estate applies to parties as well. Parking must be plentiful. Make sure that it’s not too far from your guests or they may be discouraged by the long drive. And if they do come, they may not drink for fear of driving under the influence.

Visit your neighbors.

Inform them that you are having a party for a special occasion. Give them your cell phone number and tell them to call you personally incase the party gets too loud – you can even extend a friendly invitation. This insures no one calls the cops and gets your party shut down.

Make sure you have plenty of room for a dance floor. Don’t leave anything valuable in a public place that can be broken or stolen.

2.) Reason and Theme

Now we’re not suggesting that you need a reason to throw a party, but it helps with the planning if you have one. A reason helps you to determine a theme (which we find to be crucial for any legendary party). The theme doesn’t need to be as exaggerated as a 70′s party, but even simple colors can help bring cohesion to an otherwise unorganized mess.Themes will turn a random house party something your guests talk about tomorrow, to a party they text about tonight.

"Get over here now! This party is awesome!

Sometimes finding a theme will be easy like Halloween or New Years (the most overrated night of partying of all time), or it may be a little more obscure- a surprise party for a friend.

If you don’t have a reason for throwing the party then feel free to pick from any one of the themes below:

1.) Any combination of colors (black, white, red, black and white, back and gold, black and silver, white and red, etc.)

These parties are great and usually very classy. Let guests know the dress code early and make it mandatory- even going as far as stating you will not be admitted if you are not dressed in theme. There’s nothing like having that one asshole who decided to wear a purple graphic shirt to your white party.

A Beach White Party

2.) Decade party (20′s,60′s, 70′s, 80′s, 90′s)

Hint: 80′s parties are irresistible to girls

3.) Heaven, Hell, Heaven and Hell

4.)Pirate theme

5.) ABC party- Anything But Clothes (garbage bags, duct tape, cardboard boxes etc.)

6.) School girl and Sexy Teachers Party

7.) G.I. Joe and Barbie Theme

8.) Superhero party

9.) Cowboys and Indians party

10.) Sports theme

11.) Wine or Champagne Tasting Party

-Everyone brings a bottle of wine. You cover each bottle by bag or paper and number them randomly. Everyone gets a sample of each bottle and rates them. Tally the scores and reveal the winners. The person who brought the best tasting wine wins a bottle to take home.

12.) Hawaiian Luau

13.) Mafia Party

14.) Lingerie/Playboy party

Now some of these themes may be a little too elementary for you, and some may be too high-brow, but it will give you a good launching point to help develop a successful party theme. Get the pulse of your female friends- they usually have a good sense of what the girls you know will get excited about going to.

Themes are important whether it's a house party or elegant Soiree

In fact get one of your hot female friends to help throw the party- both guys and girls tend to assume a party will be more fun when it’s thrown by a hot girl.

3.) Guest List

The guest list is vital. It will decide how successful the party will be. You want to aim for a 60/40 mix of women to men. Any more women and the party will be too catty. Any more men and it will look like a sword fight.

You should probably give guest list duties to someone else next time

Also be mindful of different social groups. A party is less fun when everyone knows each other. You want some guests to be strangers to each other at a party (this stimulates a fun chemistry), but you don’t want your hippy musician friends socializing with your boss from work. Be cognizant and recognize the social group of all your guests and try to invite like minded people.

Also be mindful that certain people won’t attend, so feel free to invite a few more people then you actually want attending. It’s always better to have a party that is too packed, then a party that is too empty.

4.) Invitations

Always start by developing a buzz via word of mouth. You want people to know that you are throwing a party soon. Use your hot friend to help accomplish this.

This can help develop an air of tension and anticipation for your party- especially if you have a reputation for throwing great parties (which you will after following our advice).

Once everything is set, and you have the date, time, and place decided, you can begin to invite people. You want to aim for at least 10 days before the party starts but never more then 3 weeks. This gives people enough time to prepare, girls enough time to go shopping for outfits, but it’s not so far ahead that people forget.

5.) Drinks

Probably the most vital thing at a party. Sure you can have fun without alcohol. But why start a fire with flint and sticks when they’ve invented the lighter?

As a cardinal rule: The drunker the people at your party get, the more fun they will have.

The key is to have plenty of alcohol. Have it chilled and ready to drink before the party starts. Make all your mixed drinks and punches beforehand so you can play a good host rather than bartender.

Read our article on building an effective home bar so you’re always ready for an impromptu get together.

An Inviting Party Bar

But for the simple essentials just take this grocery list:

1.) A Keg: The most basic of party essentials. It will service a large amount of people for very cheap.

As a general guideline you don’t want to buy more expensive beer kegs. More expensive brands achieve a higher level of flavor by adding more hops- which although make the beer more flavorful, are also very filling (remember the cardinal rule).

For kegs, you actually want to spring for a cheaper beer- Bud Light or Miller Lite. These brands use rice as a substitution to more hops to help make the beer less filling and easier to drink. In fact “Light” beers were originally invented not for the health conscious but rather the heavy drinker.

Personally, we recommend Miller Lite for your Keg purchases. It may have the stigma as being a “girly” beer, however it has less carbonation and it is easier to drink than Bud Light which girls will appreciate. And guys will drink anything anyway.

2.) A Punch: If there is one thing you need for a party, it’s a bowl of punch.

Most girls don’t like beer- at least they don’t like it enough to drink it heavily. Which is why you should always have an alternative for your guests. We recommend this recipe from DrinksRecipe for Jungle Juice.

Jungle Juice Recipe

1 L Everclear® alcohol
5.25 L (3 1.75L bottles) vodka
1 bottle peach schnapps
1 pint Bacardi® 151 rum
1 bottle 99 Apples® apple schnapps
10 L Sprite® soda
1 L Sunny Delight® orange juice
1 L triple sec
1.75 L bottle gin
1 bottle DeKuyper® Sour Apple Pucker schnapps
4 bottles Boone’s Farm® Strawberry Hill wine
8 L Hawaiian Punch®
2 containers orange juice concentrate
fruit (as much as desired)

Mix all the ingredients in a Coach’s Cooler or similar apparatus. Add the fruit and let it soak overnight. Use dry ice in a ziplock bag to help keep it cold and prevent the dry ice from melting into the recipe. Add regular ice before you serve, and add water to taste, but honestly, you can barely taste the alcohol as it is, making this a very dangerous party starter.

One cup has about 15% alcohol or the equivalent of 3 beers. After 2 or 3 cups, you can imagine how fun your party will be. The concoction is expensive to make- approximately $200 per batch depending on your location so feel free to remove some of the ingredients as you see fit- if the punch tastes like juice to begin with, removing any of the alcohol wont’t hurt.

Feel free to put some punch in a serving bowl and ladle added with fruit so your guests can serve themselves. The fruit will have a lot of alcohol naturally soaked into it, so biting into it will just provide your juice with an added punch (no pun intended).

3.) The Basics: Any party can have a keg and a bowl of punch. The best parties have a slew of alcohol to choose from displayed broadly as if saying- money is no object.

1.) A great sipping whisky (Macallan’s 18, Highland Park 21, Blue Label)

2.) A great mixing whiskey (Dewer’s 12, Crown Royal, Maker’s Mark, Black Label)

3.) A premium bottle of vodka (Belvedere or Grey Goose, and Ketel One)

4.) A great Reposado or Blanco Tequila (4 Copas, Gran Patron Silver, 1921- great for shots to help get the party started)

5.) A great selection of beers (Lagers, Dunkels, anything for the discerning beer drinker)

6.) Champagne (It’s a celebration)

7.) Amaretto (For making amaretto sours- only for girls that don’t like the taste of alcohol)

8.) Respectable selection of wines (Red, Whites, Chardonnay, Sovereign Blanc, Zinfandel, etc)

9.) Extra’s: Ice! (Get As many bags as you think you need, then get 5 more), Quality glasses, Large Heavy Duty Shaker (don’t put anything carbonated in it- rookie mistake), Towels

10.) Mixers: Soda’s, Sour mix, Juices, etc.

11.) Garnishes: Lemon and Lime Wedges, Olives, Toothpicks, and Precut lemon and lime twists (Nothing makes a drink fancier than a twist- for girls only)

12.) Something impressive to put it all in (Go dark wood, with darker leather)

4.) The unsung heroes: Cups and Ice

I have seen many great parties go downhill because people ran out of the simplest things. No one wants to wait while someone goes on a quick run to grab more cups or ice.

Even worse is running out of alcohol. It’s as if the music stops the second the last beer is cracked open. Trust us- it’s not pretty.

Also a true gentleman doesn’t throw a BYOB party. At least if you’re over 27.

5.) Food: No

Unless it’s a dinner party we would shy away from foods. People come to parties to have a good time, not get fed.

Food sobers you up, makes your breath smell, and is generally unattractive. There’s nothing sexy about typical party foods- chips, salsa, pizza etc.

If you insist, keep the food items clean- fruits, hors’dourves, steaks. Shy away from spaghetti, fish, or anything greasy.

And leave out a plate of dinner mints to help bring the party back to it’s original glory.

6.) Sense of Arrival: The most important decorations of your party

When people pull into your party and see the venue in the distance, whether it’s your house or a banquet hall you want them to get excited. You want to decorate the outside of the venue with a sense of importance.

This subtle distinction will make the difference between “Showing up” and “You’ve arrived.”

You want to create a “Sense of Arrival.”

You can do this in many ways.

A.) Balloon Arch: A balloon arch is great for indoor events. It is very labor intensive but if you have a couple girls helping you then you have a very classy and cheap way to build an entrance.

B.) Tiki Torches: This is our favorite way to create the impression of a truly great party. A few strategically placed Tiki Torches creating a pathway leading towards the entrance will transform a “get-together” to a “Soiree.”

Tiki Torches Always Create A "Sense of Arrival"

C.) Ice Sculpture: If you have the money, there is really no better way to wow your guests. Places strategically in the lobby or hallway of your party, a well made Ice Sculpture will shock your guests, make a perfect backdrop for pictures, and truly leave a lasting memory for all your guests.

Epic Ice Sculpture

7.) Decorations

Cut a check. Give it to the girls. Let them go crazy. Trust us.

8.) Music

If alcohol is the lighter, then music is the gasoline. Hiring a DJ should definitely be part of your budget. Don’t take recommendations, make sure you have personally seen the DJ spin.

You want a DJ that can easily transition from one song to the next, but more importantly a DJ that can effectively read a crowd and know exactly what song to play next. Anyone can play a pre-recorded podcast from a famous DJ, but it takes real skill to play the perfect song for that particular crowd.

A Solid Dj is Important

A good DJ will start out with mild lounge music as people are mingling and developing their buzz. He won’t waste good songs when no one is dancing.

He will know exactly when to start playing the hits to coax the crowd onto the dance floor. And he will know exactly what songs to play to keep them glued there.

Feel free to give the DJ a few songs that you would like to be played throughout the night, but if he’s a professional- mostly just let him do his job.

If a DJ isn’t in your budget, make sure to make a playlist of songs designed well in advance of the party.

Ideally you will make two playlists: one of mellow techno, jazz, and Sinatra as people are entering the party.

Then a second full of the greatest dance hits once the party gets popping.

A Good Dj will coax people to the dance floor

Having a preset playlist will ensure that you don’t have a crowd of “experts” crowding around the Ipod trying to decide what to play next.

9.) Dancing

If the drinks are cold, the crowd is right, and the music is good, dancing is inevitable.

There are a few things you can do to help grease the system. Make sure you have a dance floor that is in front of the DJ.

There’s something about a solid piece of concrete, wood, or tile in front of a DJ system that makes people want to dance. People just don’t like dancing on grass or uneven surfaces, for obvious reasons.

Dancing is essential for any great party

Make sure the area is well air-conditioned or cool. If the party is too hot, you invited too many people for your venue which is bad planning on your part.

Don’t throw an outdoor party if you live in a humid location. People will avoid dancing because they don’t want to sweat, which is bad planning on your part.

The most important thing you can do to ensure people start dancing is keep the lights low. Your whole party should have a level of ambiance similar to a candlelit dinner (without the candles, those are dangerous and will start a fire).

Everyone looks better in a dim light, and are more inclined to dance if they feel they can hide in the shadows and the crowd. So turn off a few lights, install a dimmer, or shade a few lightbulbs, and let the organic flow of your party develop.

Low light doesn't hide everyone's dancing, though

If people are still shying away from the dance floor you can always tell the DJ that if anyone requests to play a song, he makes it mandatory that they dance to it. No one wants to be the first person on the dance floor. You can wait for someone to get drunk (brave) enough to try, or you can force it yourself.

10.) Being a Good Host

Take care of all the other rules well before the party starts because you will need to devote your time and energy to rule number ten.

This is the most important rule of throwing a great party.

Greet every guest at the door, whether they are a stranger or close friend. Welcome them to your party. Grab a drink for them and tell them to help themselves for another round. Then cordially pass them off to someone they know so they can feel comfortable.

Never stay with one group for too long. Be sure to introduce guests to each other. You must be a director of fun at your party and ensure that everyone is enjoying their time.

If you feel the party needs a spark you can always play one of my favorite drinking games- Flip Cup

Flip cup requires a long table, a pitcher of beer or punch and several plastic cups.

Teams of three or more will line up on opposite sides of the table with cups, half full of drink.

Then during every round you start at one end of the table, chugging your cup and then placing the cup on the edge of the table and “flipping” it until the cup lands top side down. The next person doesn’t begin chugging until the person before them has finished successfully ”flipping” his cup.

First team to finish flipping all of the cups wins.

Flip cup to help get the party started

Before every round make sure that both teams start by clapping and making noise, and then the first two opponents tap cups and then chug. This creates a lot of commosion and makes the party look a lot more fun and lively than it actually is.

This works especially well for parties that are just beginning. It is a lot better to see a small group of people cheering and playing this game, then sitting around waiting for the party to start.

Execution

If you keep up with these rules, you should immediately develop a reputation for throwing magnificent parties. Don’t skimp on any of the details. It only takes one great party to be crowned the “Diddy” of your friends, but it only takes one bad party to completely shatter that repuation.

Hope you have a great time throwing your next party.

Wilder things have happened

Good Luck and Happy Hunting.

-The Haute Spot

Also, make sure to keep an eye on your guests and don’t let anyone drive home intoxicated.

1.) Inspection

Common CIgar Sizes

There are many camps on how to light a cigar. Some say you can only use a cedar spill. Some say you can only use a butane lighter. Some say you need a cutter. Some say real cigar aficionado’s use thier teeth. Whatever the theory may be, they all begin the same way..

Take the cigar our of the cellophane wrapper.

Cigar smoking is a love affair. You don’t just throw it in your mouth and puff away. Appreciate the cigar for what it is –A hand-rolled masterpiece. Anyone that has ever seen a cigar being made knows the level of craftsmanship that goes into creating a cigar. The amount of care and detail, and the level of quality of the ingredients makes it amazing that you can buy them for $10 a stick.

First let’s discuss the different parts of the cigar.

The bottom of the cigar where you can see the open tobacco is called the foot.

Cigar Foot

This is the part you light.

The other rounded end is called the cap or head.

Head, Shoulder and Cap of a Ciar

It is sealed so you will need to cut it open in order to properly draw in smoke. The rest of the cigar is composed of the filler, the tobacco inside of the cigar. This is all held together by the wrapper, which is the outside leaf that holds the filler together.

The glue used to hold this beauty together is vegetable based and non-toxic. Some companies even use sap to give a hint of molasses to their cigars.

So inspect the cigar. Gently squeeze it and feel for lumps. Notice if the outside leaf has any veins. Finally smell the tobacco. A properly humidified cigar will have a damp tobacco smell.

A cigar that has been improperly stored or dried out will feel dry in the hand, may crunch when squeezed lightly, have rips and breaks in the wrapper, and smell slightly stale, like the clothes of a smoker.

Avoid Bad Cigars

If you are purchasing the cigar for yourself, go with a “mild” flavored cigar. Don’t be afraid to ask for a recommendation from the store owner, they love talking about their passion. Go for a smaller sized cigar to acclimate your taste buds. Typically the lighter in color the wrapper, the less intense the flavor. A “Maduro” or dark colored cigar may be too strong for some, but that’s what I started smoking with, so it can be done.

2.) Cut the Cigar

Look closely at the head of the cigar and you will see the cap.

Cigar Cap

The cap is a slightly different color than the rest of the cigar and looks similar to a Yakima on the top of the cigar. This is what you will cut in order to smoke a cigar.

The Perfect Cut

You must be careful however.

The cap is crucial and must remain intact for fear of the cigar unraveling. The most common mistake cigar smokers make is cutting off too much of the cap, or even worse, actually cutting into the cigar wrapper.

Way too much

The hole needed to smoke a cigar is a lot smaller then you think, about the size of a pencil eraser. So when cutting the cigar make sure to only cut off only a small amount. You can always make a hole bigger, but you can never undue the damage caused by cutting off to much.

Ok so now that you understand what needs to be done we will explain the tools:

Cigar Punch: The easiest way to cut a cigar is with a cigar punch. It is merely a round blade that will cleanly “punch” a hole through the cap. If you want a larger hole you can simply punch the cigar several times until the hole is large enough.

Cigar Punch

Cigar Guillotine: The cigar guillitoine is a double edged cutter that will cleanly cut the cigar from both ends.

Cigar Guillotine

The best way to cut with the guillotine is to gently rest the blades on the cigar so you can see where it will cut and then snip quickly and cleanly. This is our personal favorite cutter as it gives you the most freedom as the the size of the hole. We recommend the Xikar Cuttar as it is self sharpening,

Table Top V-Cutter: Usually seen in cigar shops, this is another fool-proof method of cutting a cutter.

V Cut Cigar Cutter

You merely insert the cigar and pull down on the lever and the cutter will cleanly shave a V-shaped opening at the head of the cigar.

V Cut CIgar

Personally, I feel the draw is too tight with this cutter and my cigar ends up being too hard to smoke, but it’s definitely worth a try.

Cigar Scissors: Self-Explanatory. Should work similarly to the guillotine cutter, but I’ve had terrible results and ruined many great cigars.

Cigar Scissors

They look great but aren’t gentle enough

Your Teeth: Only use as a last resort. Even a knife, pen, or key would be better suited to punch a hole in a cigar. But if you must, then nibble cleanly a small hole in the cap being careful not to accidentally pull the cap completely off.

Pull the tobacco from your lip with your fingers. Never Spit. It’s not effective. You will merely look like a bug landed on your lip and will ended up using your fingers anyway.

3.) Test the draw

Once the cigar is cut, puff on the cigar and see if the draw is too your liking. You should have to use a little pressure to get air flowing into your mouth.

If the cigar draws too open and allows too much air, the cigar will burn hot, quickly, and will mask the real flavor of the leaf. You cut off too much.

If the cigar draws too tight and is very difficult to puff, the cigar will burn cold and be frustratingly difficult to keep lit. Open the cut slightly.

If the cigar still draws tight, it might have a knot. Gentle squeeze the cigar and feel for any lumps, if the lump is near the foot of the cigar, consider cutting the section off and smoking the rest. If cutting is not an option, then use a small wire (paperclip) and very gently poke the knot to loosen the area. Be careful to not rip the wrapper or ruin the rest of the cigar. Usually this will help alleviate the problem, and save the stubborn cigar.

4.) Lighting the Cigar

First, remove any wrappers or labels located near the foot of the cigar if they have one.

Never use a candle, a liquid fueled lighter, or any other questionable source of flame. They will all ruin the taste of the cigar.

There are only three ways to light a cigar. Using a match, a cedar spill, or butane lighter.

Match: Light the match and let the match burn down slightly. The initial spark from a match comes from the sulphur and while it does make a larger flame, will impart a sour taste in your cigar. It will take several matches to properly light the cigar and get an even burn.

Although improper etiquette, feel free to puff the cigar under the flame to help jump the flame onto the tobacco. This will help get the cigar lit quickly and will use less matches.

Lighting a cigar with a match

If the number of matches is of no concern, then jump down to the butane lighter technique and use the same theory.

Cedar Spill: The most romantic of cigar lighting techniques. Commonly found in premium cigar shops, cedar strips or “spills” are strips of cedar, that can be used to create an aromatic even burning light. They can be found as dividers of cigar boxes or purchased separately.

Cedar Spills

Regardless of acquisition, they require the same technique as butane lighters, so just continue reading below.

Butane Lighters: The easiest and preferred method of lighting a cigar, butane lighters provide the most control and most even burning flame. You are looking for a lighter with a strong jet blue flame.

Cigar Torch

Some companies even sell lighters with two, three, or even four flames, but we feel that ruins the romance and allure of lighting a cigar. So here’s the proper gentlemanly way to do it:

Torch the foot: No we’re not torturing anyone here. We merely mean to light the foot of the cigar. Proper technique requires you to hold the cigar at a 45 degree angle above the flame and allow the cigar to flirt with the heat of the lighter- never directly placing the cigar in the flame (which will char the tobacco and impart a poor flavor).

Lighting a cigar

This requires time and patience, which is a necessity for cigar smoking. A small cigar will require at least half an hour of your time, and a larger cigar may take over an hour to fully enjoy. Lighting a cigar is part of the experience so don’t rush it.

Rolling: Continue to roll the cigar in the heat until you get an even burn emanating from the foot of the cigar. Feel free to blow on the cigar to help increase the heat on a particular section to ensure an even burn.

Ensuring an evenly lit cigar

Continue this process until you are satisfied that the cigar is properly lit.

Avoid puffing on the cigar while it is being lit, this will cause the flame to jump charring the tobacco and inhaling noxious fumes which alter the taste of the tobacco.

No

Puffing: Instead, after the cigar is lit, blow gently to remove any char/fumes that may impart a sour taste, inspect the burn, and then get ready to enjoy the cigar.

5.) Holding the cigar: You don’t hold a cigar like a cigarette. You hold it between your thumb and forefinger, letting it rest gently on the edge of your middle finger if you please.

Holding a Cigar, Notice the even burn

Keep the cigar in your hand and at your hip. Let it rest on an ashtray only if you are leaving the area.

Be mindful or wind direction from blowing on your cigar which will affect the even burn, and where the smoke is blowing- not everyone loves the smell of tobacco, and a true gentlemen never makes anyone feel uncomfortable, even unintentionally.

6.) Actually smoking the cigar: Ok enough foreplay. How to actually smoke a cigar.

Cigar smoke is very harsh and will cause you to cough so the key is to not inhale.

Easier said than done.

The trick, for those not used to breathing in without inhaling, is to take a deep breath, and the puff on the cigar.This will make it impossible for you to accidentally inhale the tobacco smoke. Once the cigar smoke is in your mouth, let it linger for a while,  and then breathe it out. Rinse. And  Repeat.

Congratulations, this may be your first cigar but everyone at the table thinks you’re a cigar aficionado.

Constantly check the cigar to ensure an even burn is maintained. Feel free to blow on the foot of the cigar if you feel a section is not keeping up, or in extreme cases you may use your lighter to speed up the process.

Cigar smoking does create a large amount of saliva which some find annoying. So if for the company is appropriate, and you are outdoors and near grass, feel free to spit. Do this cleanly and sparingly. Amongst proper guests, and indoors, suck it up and swallow.

7.)Remove the band: After a few puffs, the heat from the cigar will melt the glue on the wrapper, please remove it now. Leaving a wrapper on a cigar is controversial, and there are two camps of theory. Those in Europe and the Middle East consider it a sign of arrogance and showmanship, those in North and South America see it as optional.

Personally, it is better to err on the side of conservatism and simply remove the cigar label. Sure someone might think your Ed Hardy shirt is cool, but chances are people will think you’re a douche. Leaving a label on is for amateurs,

8.) Tasting the cigar:Typically, the first few times you smoke a cigar, you won’t be able to taste anything or truly appreciate the cigar. Your taste buds will simply tingle as they acclimate to the smoke. Similar to drinking your first beer, or sipping your first glass of wine. It may take several sticks to get used to the smoke and develop a taste for the cigar.

Once you get used to smoking a cigar, after several puffs, as the ash develops, and the cigar begins to burn cooler you will have a better sense of the taste of the cigar- usually about halfway down the cigar all the way to just below of the shoulder of the cigar (the sweet spot). Smoking will cause the flavor to concentrate in the bottom half of the cigar so while the first half of the cigar may taste empty and light, the bottom half will taste rich.

Let the smoke swirl in your mouth, cool down, and allow your tongue to bathe in the flavors. Note the hints of leather, chocolate, coffee, honey, and wood in your tobacco.

Also note the body of the smoke. A mild cigar will have the body of skim milk, while a full bodied cigar will feel like heavy cream in your mouth.

Hint: Write down your own personal review on the back of the wrapper and save them for later. You can help use this system to determine what cigars to buy next by knowing what you like, and what you don’t like. How will you ever know that you like Amberbock if you keep buying Guiness?

9.) Ashing the Cigar: Don’t worry about ashing a cigar. The long ash of a cigar is an indication of a well made stick. It also helps to cool down the burn of the cigar. This lets a cooler smoke enter your mouth and allows for a better tasting experience. Don’t worry about the ash falling on your clothes, it wipes clean (I know from experience).

The only time I would recommend ashing a cigar is if the cigar has gone out, or is about to go out. If that’s the case then follow these steps.

Relighting a Cigar

Ashing a cigar is easy. You merely gently tap it against the ashtray until the ash falls off. The problem is the char. If you relight the char it will be acidic and bitter. Feel free to blow on the cigar to help dislodge the ash or tap it lightly to cause to fall out, then simply follow the same technique you used before to initially light the cigar. You can also cut the cigar and begin a new.

Regardless it may take a while for the cigar to stabilize and return to it’s original flavor. Don’t let that discourage you, relighting a cigar is very common and is a skill that needs to be mastered if you ever intend on making cigar smoking a part of your lifestyle.

10.) Extinguishing the Cigar

When the flame gets too close for comfort, time is up, or you wish to save the rest of the cigar for later, there comes a time to extinguish the cigar.

The proper way is to let it die gently in an ash tray.

Do not try and press the flame out. This will cause the cigar to smoke heavily and leave an awful acrid smell that will not easily be removed. Cigar smoke usually dissipates within a few hours indoors, but extingusing a cigar by force in this manner and you will have a much harder time.

Also never leave a cold cigar for too long indoors as the same effect will occur.

Once the cigar has died, ensure the flame is extinguished by touching the foot gently. If it is too warm to touch, it is too warm to discard and could cause a fire hazard. Once properly cooled, feel free to discard, or place back into the cellophane wrapper and save it for later.

With these rules you should be well on your way to enjoying one of life’s simplest treasures. Churchill, Hemmingway, and all the Cubans on Calle Ocho can’t be wrong. Cigar smoking isn’t just a hobby, it’s a way of life.

Tickets are nasty. Not only are you paying a fine, but they give you points which increase your insurance. But if you drive like a red-blooded man, chances are you’re gonna get one. So here’s what you do according to our cop.

If you don't have tits, then here's what you do..

1.) Turn off the car, turn on the interior lights, lower windows (back ones too if you have tints), and then keep your hands on the steering wheel

Cops have a stressful job. They don’t only deal with nice people like you and I, but the majority of their calls are to crazies. Help remove the tension from the situation by showing that you are not going to run, are a rational human being, and understand the severity of the circumstances.

2.) Submit

Every day cops deal with people that argue, fight, and question their authority. Don’t be that guy.

You ever see a submissive dog roll on it’s back to show it’s belly? Be that dog.

Swallow your pride and things will go much smoother for you. So be polite, do exactly what the officer says, and don’t plead your case until the officer gives you an opportunity to.

3.) Charm the Officer

When it boils down to it. Cops are human beings. They want the same things everyone else does. To be appreciated, respected and sympathized with. You show them all three, and you might just get a warning.

But we at The Haute Spot don’t work on “might,” we like sure things. So like we always do- we have given you a script on exactly what to say:

Officer: Do you know why I pulled you over today?

You: (Say this quickly, and don’t let the officer interrupt you until you finish) Yes I do officer, and I completely apologize. If you want to give me a ticket I completely understand, because you are just doing your job, and guys like you keep the bad guys off the street.

Someones heart just melted. Stonewall Jackson has become Little Bo Peep. You have just given the officer everything he could’ve asked for: appreciation, respect, and sympathy. Nine times out of ten, the officer will go back to his car check for warrants. If you’ve got a clean record, he will most likely let you get off with a warning.  Congratulations. No need to thank us.

Now what happens if he still gives you a ticket…

Chances are if he goes to his car before you can plead your case, he’s coming back with the ticket. So don’t let him leave without asking to speak to him. But sometimes, it’s just out of your control. While there’s technically no “quota,” they still get pressure to write a certain amount of tickets. Or the officer may just be having a bad day.

Regardless, you need to protect yourself.

Notice our wording. We never actually admitted to anything. We just admitted to doing something wrong, and apologized.

This is key because admission makes it very difficult to fight the ticket in court. If he hands you a ticket for speeding, act shocked.

YOU: Speeding? I thought this was for my broken taillight (assuming you DON’T have a broken taillight)

Then you can just go on following the advice from our friends at lifehacker

Just a few more things:

1.) Make your case, but continue to be nice. You want the officer to forget you so he’s less likely to show in court- which is an automatic dismissal of the case for you.

2.) Don’t hire a traffic lawyer. Show up yourself. Traffic lawyers are sweat shops. They have so many cases they rarely do anything more then file paperwork for you, and hardly get anything done that you can’t do yourself.

Plus it gives the impression that you don’t care about the ticket, and are probably guilty. Showing up yourself- in a suit- shows personal attention and a perceived innocence, because you care so much about the ticket.

3.) Lastly, don’t forget the dates. The pre-trial and the actual trial. I know it seems basic, but it’s happened before. Mark you calendar and show up on time. If you don’t show up, you’re automatically guilty, so you have to pay the fine and all the points and insurance increases that come with it.

Good Luck and Happy Hunting

Paul Walker to Jason Stratham.

This subtle shift in culture over the past couple of years is being reflected in everyday culture, most notably how advertisers try and target the male demographic.

Old Spice has come out with commercials showing wimps turning into men

Mitchum Man has used a clever campaign littered with matching, borderline sexist, slogans like: “If they look real enough, you’re a Mitchum Man,” “If you still order your coffee Small, Medium, or Large, you’re a Mitchum Man,” “If your socks kind of match, you’re a Mitchum Man.”

Typical Mitchum Man Ad

One shift that has been particularly pronounced has been liquor commercials. Grey Goose commercials showing scantily clad women partying have been replaced by Ketel One commercials emphasizing male bonding. A girl dancing in a club for Beck’s, to the “Most Interesting Man in the World.” In fact, the majority of new commercials coming from liquor distributors have not featured women at all. They’ve centered around the relationships men have with their friends, their fathers, and their ego.

So without further ado the Top 5 Liquor commercials of this era:

5.)

A father-son relationship emblazoned.  Can’t get better then that. We’ll excuse the poetry.

4.)

Although this commercial breaks the mold, and does have women in it, the focus is on being a gentlemen, and not being a pig. We like the simplicity, admiration, and the subtle plug for drinking responsibly. Very well done.

3.)

You really have to watch this one twice, because the jazz overpowers the message. “It took him 12 years to get the gig in this joint, and now he’s been headlining for 25″ We love the mentor, protege, relationship in this one. Truly phenomenal.

2.)

We have shivers down our spine.

1.)

A little predictable we know, and beer is technically not liquor, but you can’t deny the alarming success of this campaign. He exudes masculinity, and probably has never even heard of the term metrosexual. It captures the essence the advertisers were trying to employ perfectly. Blends the perfect amount of humor and message. It is for this reason, we consider “The Most Interesting Man in the World,” the top liquor commercial of this era.

Feel like we’re missing a commercial? Let us know, we’d love to keep this list updated.

This technique involves slipping a $20, $50, or $100 dollar bill  in the hands of a patron with the hopes of getting something in return. I have personally used this technique in three situations that have all worked phenomenally:

1.) Getting into a club where I didn’t know the doorman.

2.) Getting an upgraded hotel room from the concierge.

3.) Ensuring my luggage gets on a plane when I arrived 20 minutes before takeoff

There is a great thread talking about the success of slipping a $20 here.

A smile and a Jackson can soften anyone up

The trick with tipping in this manner is understanding the needs and wishes of the people you tip. You can’t just go around waving a Franklin and expecting better service. Often times they have a supervisor nearby, the establishment’s policy discourages tips, they may not feel comfortable accepting a tip in front of their coworkers. Understanding this you will need to be discrete. You need to help them help you.

How To Tip Properly

We discourage blatantly saying you will tip the patron, flashing money, or dropping a $20 on a counter- this is rude, shocking, and crass. Instead state your request, and ask for their help. Then repeat these magic words:

“If you take care of me, I will take care of you.”

Pulling out your wallet or casually placing your wallet on the counter will help reinforce what “take care of” truly means to you. If they accept:

1.) Grab the bill or bills and fold it in your hand

Fold the bill in your hand and tip discretely

2.) Shake their hand

3.) Exchange the money

Here are a few conversations I have had in the past, the patrons objections, and what I have done to overcome them.

At a club:

Dealing with Bouncers

Bouncer: Are you on the list?

Me: No, I am not.

Bouncer: ::Looking at me and my party of 6:: Ok it’s going to be $20 each.

Me: Is there anyway you could hook us up?

Bouncer: Sorry, you’re all going to have to pay.

Me: Are you sure? If you take care of me, I will take care of you. ::Pulls out wallet::

Bouncer: ::Softening up:: No.. you still have to pay

Me: I’d much rather pay you, then her ::referring to cashier- while opening wallet::

Bouncer: ::Thinks for a second:: Ok, go ahead. ::Opens velvet rope, tells cashier that we’re all ok to go in::

Me: ::Slips the bouncer a $20, escort my group in, enjoy the rest of the night with a smirk on my face::

This was an actual conversation at a Miami club. It was as simple as that. My whole party was escorted in like we owned the place, we saved $100 between the 6 of us, I solidified my reputation amongst my friends for being able to get in anywhere, and we all had a great time.

At a Hotel:

Bellagio Front Desk

What a lot of people don’t realize is that concierges and booking agents have unbelievable power when it comes to giving away goodies- from room upgrades, meal comps, drink tickets, and club passes. Because of this power, this technique works even better at hotels.

First

Research the hotel you are staying at. Familiarize yourself with the different suite upgrades they have available. Then call the front desk ahead of time, ask a few questions, find out if the person you are speaking with will be working when you check in. If they will not be working, call back until you find someone who will. Then ask for their name.

Next

When you arrive for check in, go directly to the guy (keyword- guy) you spoke with on the phone. Remind him of the conversation you had on the phone. When he remembers you, make sure you keep using his name throughout the conversation (this develops a good repoire).

Ask him “Busy Day?”

Service industry people love this question, because it’s a refreshing change of pace to see someone care about their feelings rather than worrying about everyone else’s.

After you soften him up a little bit ask directly which suite upgrade you would like by name.

They will usually quote the standard upgrade price. This is what you will do next.

Here is an actual conversation I had with a concierge in Vegas.

At a Hotel:

Concierge: “Ok sir, if you would like to upgrade your room that will be an extra $165/night”

Me: Please, call me (my name). (Insert his name here) Is there anything else we can do to make this upgrade happen. “If you take care of me, I will take care of you.” ::places wallet on counter::

Concierge: ::looks at the wallet, then pretends to crunch a few numbers in his computer:: Ok (my name), you have just been upgraded to (Inset fancy name here) suite, complimentarily.

Me: Why thank you (insert name here). Do you mind helping me up to my room with my bags?

They always oblige (customer service is always number one in any decent hotel). I then use this time to further increase my relationship with the concierge, pick his brain for any great shows, clubs, attractions, that I must see. He tells me to come back down and he will get me some free passes to everything he can.

I never let him actually carry my luggage, I tell him “don’t worry about it, I just didn’t want to tip you in front of your boss, I know how it works- I used to work the front desk in (insert Miami hotel here).” I then slip him some decent bank roll.

Because of this I was able to stay in a penthouse suite for an entire weekend which would have cost me over a grand for less than $200 a night, including the tip.

You can skimp and get away with slipping a bouncer a $20, or even a $10 if you’re really bold, because by the time he accepts the cash, you and your crew are already half-way through the entrance. But, with a concierge, I would tip generously. They will remember you throughout the weekend and continue to give you great advice, comps, and service.

Last Minute Tips:

-Black guys tend to hook it up the most

-Asian ladies tend to hook it up the least

-Generally guys will hook it up more than women will

And that’s it. Feel free to use this technique at any number of places:

1.) Ticket collectors at sporting events

2.) Baggage handlers

3.) A host at your favorite restaurant

4.) Yacht rental clubs

5.) Rent-A-Car locations

The sky is the limit. You never know what you can get away. It doesn’t hurt to ask. Good luck, and happy hunting.

Hosting is an art

There are tons of way to impress guests when entertaining in one’s home. You can show off the old big screen, flat or otherwise. You can always cash in cool points on having a good collection of pretty much anything that doesn’t make you seem like a pre-teen trapped in an adult’s body. So knives, books, art, and furniture are a yes; baseball cards, and action figures, and we’ll assume the 40 Year Old Virgin was based on a true story.

One guaranteed crowd-pleaser is a stocked home bar. Something about having a home bar, and by that I mean something that is more than a cabinet with a couple bottles of liquor and wine, really gets people’s juices flowing. You don’t even need to build a gigantic fully stocked home bar, just something with the “bar essentials” that can be placed in the corner or a back of a room or salon. Once that’s done, a simple cocktail recipe book and a little common sense is all you need. Here are the basics for a small bar at home.

THE BOOZE:
Beer, Lager(refrigerate)
Blended whiskey or Rye
Bourbon
Brandy
Gin
Pernod
Red wine, Cabernet Sauvignon and/or dry French
Rum, light
Scotch
Sherry, dry
Tequila, white
Triple Sec
Vermouth, dry and sweet
Vodka(keep in freezer)
White wine, dry French or California chardonnay(refrigerate)

Good start

MIXERS:
Cola
Cranberry juice
Diet soda
Ginger ale
Grapefruit juice
Lemon juice
Lemon-lime soda
Lime juice
Orange juice
Sparkling water
Tomato juice
Tonic water

GARNISHES AND CONDIMENTS:
Angostura bitters
Bar sugar
Black pepper
Cocktail Olives
Grenadine
Lemons
Limes
Maraschino cherries
Oranges
Tabasco sauce
Worcestershire sauce

GLASSWARE:
Brandy sniffer
Champagne flute
Cocktail glass
Highball glass
Old-Fashioned glass
Pilsner glass
Wine goblet

TOOLS OF THE TRADE:
Bar spoon
Blender
Bottle opener
Citrus reamer
Corkscrew
Jigger
Measuring cup
Measuring spoons
Mixing glass
Paring Knife
Standard shaker
Strainer.

Don’t let sheer magnitude of the list scare you. Build your bar slowly by starting with the basics:

1.) A great sipping whisky (Macallan’s 18, Highland Park 21, Blue Label)

2.) A great mixing whiskey (Dewer’s 12, Crown Royal, Maker’s Mark, Black Label)

3.) A premium bottle of vodka (Belvedere or Grey Goose, and Ketel One)

4.) A great Reposado or Blanco Tequila (4 Copas, Gran Patron Silver, 1921)

5.) A great selection of beers (Lagers, Dunkels, and your college favorite for impromptu parties)

6.) Champagne (Either for a celebration, or for girls that don’t like the taste of alcohol)

7.) Amaretto (For making amaretto sours- only for girls that don’t like the taste of alcohol)

8.) Respectable selection of wines (Red, Whites, Chardonnay, Sovereign Blanc, Zinfandel, etc)

9.) Extra’s: Ice! , Quality glasses, Large Heavy Duty Shaker (don’t put anything carbonated in it- rookie mistake), Towels

10.) Mixers: Soda’s, Sour mix, Juices, etc.

11.) Something impressive to put it all in (Go dark wood, with darker leather)

Impromptu Party

Good luck and happy hosting.

Hat Tip